Healing the Body Temple

One of the biggest gifts that working with Kryon energies and teachings has given me is the deep connect with my body. This connect has taught me a practice of deep listening of my body at cellular levels. And did my body have stories to tell! All these years, I have only spoken to my body, and listened only sometimes. I've even negotiated with it, with regard to rest, sleep, aches and pains. And the beautiful companion that it has been, it always co-operated.

When I accessed the cellular levels, I was amazed at the memories that were piled up inside. A respectful, non-interfering, non-judgmental listening opened up a library of information. The more respectful I was to my body wisdom, the more I could access. One simple way to communicate this respect was to follow what it said, about simple things like food, rest, even clothes I wear. Slowly, and surely, a bond was built, and a new partnership emerged.

I began to love and rever my body. This obviously meant that I stopped abusing it. I was always particular of eating healthy food, but that is not the only thing that the body stores and processes.

Every single emotion that I have experienced, is held by the body too. And I have held plenty of corrosive emotions in my body. Anger, jealousy, fear, hatred, lesserness, rejection, sorrow, hurt... in short, the works. I understood that every situation that brings in these emotions gets stored in my cells in the form of residues called memories. And memories with charges are nothing but incomplete outcomes. Something happened, and I was affected, an emotional charge was triggered, and though the moment passed, it left unhappy memories. And where do these go? Oh no, they just don't melt away into the ethers as I had naively thought, they went and settled in my body as 'memories', waiting for completion. Nothing is ever forgotton. If an emotional charge has been triggered, the body demands completion. And its way of doing it is to store the memory, for future reference and completion. So this does not happens in the 3D gross dimension, but in the emotional body, that sits in the physical body, and this stored emotion exists as cellular memory. I had been slowly and surely messing up my energetic body.

So what happens when I have a storehouse of cellular memories? The fear that I had experienced earlier, wants to warn me everytime: 'beware, this situation is potentially dangerous. Remember the last time blah blah blah....' and the memories release their emotional charges, and before I know it, I have already reacted to the situation in auto-pilot. I was simply a helpless trigger mechanism of all the stored demons inside.

For me, my favourite emotion has always been hurt. My wounded inner child needed this emotion to exist and thrive, and I became a constant supplier. No matter what the situation, I had the ability to interpret hurt for myself. It had become my comfort zone. All the 'no one loves me, no one understands me, I am all alone' stuff. Funny, I was happiest when I was hurting! The wounded inner child was ruling from a throne, and I energised and fed her everyday!

So the process of listening to my body began the most awsome process of releasing all the hurt (and several other emotions) that I had stored in the body. I did a 21 day process, and was amazed at what my body was now ready to release and free itself from. I requested each part of the body, to release what it was holding, as I was ready to let it go. Some of the scenes that I saw as the 'stuff' left was quite amazing. Lifetimes of terror, war, starvation, fires, floods, earthquakes, and much more was released. I actually lost weight, and was feeling free.

The Vipassana experience further connected me to my body. I could enter every single part of the body, and witness its process. I can understand how much clearing was happening just in the witnessing. Since I had a practice of body listening, I could pay attention to each part, and feel the sensations, movements, and nuances. There was so much going on! Perspiration and hot flashes would drench me periodically, as the cleansing continued. I was able to see the muscles, bones, and different body organs. It was intense.

Since then, my connection to my body, and the healing processes have been further enhanced. with the power of imagination, I now visit the temple of rejuvination, and get healing for whatever is required. And my healed body is all the validation I need!

Am loving it!

'I'.......... am not ready yet

So many of us are on the edge of living our extraordinary lives, shining our brilliance, but hesitate. As someone who involved in transformation work, there is a phrase I come upon very often. When all these wonderful souls are reminded of their magnificence, and invited to live from there, I hear the oft repeated phrase: ‘I’m not ready yet’.

There are many of us, who are here to work with the light, to make a difference at these crucial times, yet drag their feet to come full on with their powers.
So what’s stopping them from acknowledging our leadership role? Is it
Because they cannot see it

Because they are too scared

Because they are overwhelmed by the demands of life

Because they are settling for less

Because they dont think they are in charge

Because they'll upset the apple cart

Because...
...there are a thousand reasons to "take the low road" and live the familiar life, but there's only one result at the end--a nagging feeling that you missed out on something vital in life and a slow death of the soul fire.

We seem to be there, but believe in taking small steps, dimming our light ‘so as to not blind’ those around with our glare, as one lightworker put it. Do I have to be apologetic if my light is bright? No!

You are ready. You are the hologram that contains the entire universe, even if a tiny speck called the 'conscious you' does not remember yet.

It is the ‘I’ which stops you. The ‘I’ that you believe is your identity is stopping you from growth. If something big comes to you, it comes to you because you are worthy of it. The ‘I’ that you identify with, stops you from trusting. It stops you from surrendering to your soul contract. This ‘I’ gives you innumerable reasons to doubt, suspect and disown your power, passion and purpose. This ‘I’ makes you create a future that is built from your past. All your fears, i.e. your past, are dumped into the future, and you say, ‘it is difficult’. Playing small does not serve you in any way. ‘I’m not ready’ is a malady that needs immediate cure.

The universe knows where to take us, because it comes from future to now. It comes from knowing our highest magnificence. Do challenge the ‘I’ identity that you are choosing to live. It is suffocating and totally unsuitable for you now. And as soon as this ‘I’ is resolved, everything happens.

In short, develop trust and surrender. As a cause and effect, ask yourself, ‘what else is possible?’ As a gain, everything is possible. Lets come from possibility.
Life is about possibility and not certainty. Lets not just survive, lets thrive. Let our passion decide our profession. Then, we'll find our perfect fit with the universe.
Step into your blazing magnificence with confidence. Its your truth.

Say the magic mantra, 'I'm ready', and allow the magic to unfolds. As Kryon says, 'mastery is in your veins'.

In the beautiful land called the Rann of Kutch, where I was facilitating a lab for young persons, I enjoyed existing with a keen awareness of my existance, within and without. We were living in a lovely resort, in the middle of nowhere (almost), with flamingoes and elegant wild asses as neighbours. The earthiness of the place, including feeling the earth under my feet, as we sat in the tents for our work, made me and my work more grounded.

While there, in the utter silence of the environment, I could listen to the smallest shifts, crackles and sounds inside me. I wish to share about the awareness that happened of the insidious process by which I passed a judgement in my head about someone, or held a complaint, which got glossed over. This process happened with quickness, came and went like a flash of lightning. and forgotton, as I rushed from one activity to another. I thank my guides for pointing this out to me. With the first judgement, the seed, I began buiding an image where none existed. And the process of putting people in frames began. I realised how it all begins with one judgement, made in unawareness. This one unchecked judgement became the foundation or seed that birthed a new one everytime I was before the framed person. When judgements come, complaints are sure to follow!

So, the 'aha' moment for me was.. 'so this is how the meaning making begins, so quietly, so insidiously, till I have collected enough 'evidence' for me to feel right about it.' I must say it was a thilling moment for me. Of how the seed becomes the tree, a 'fruitful' tree, and the fruit is called 'I am right'. Everytime I pass a judgement, I am watering the seed, which, with regular nourishment, becomes a healthy, deeply rooted, fruit-bearing tree! Then I can say with surety, 'she is always like that, he is always doing this'. The 'always' word in my vocabulary is the giveaway that something suspicious is going on underground. I begin to operate with such persons within a frame of reference and meaning that I have created. This is a heavy, tiresome, critical way to relate.

So the practice I began was a weeding process of my judgements, complaints, blames, assumptions before going to bed. I scanned my day, and let go all that stuff I was holding on to, cleared the air, and then went to sleep. I reeled back my projections, owned what I was refusing to acknowledge within myself. I know I judge in others what I don't own in myself. I got a clue to what I was denying looking at within. I'm happy I could prevent myself from wronging someone in my head. Living in judgement entirely my creation. I slept freer, and woke up happier.

Its wonderful to wake up with a smile every morning with the 'goggle goggle' throaty sounds of the turkeys on campus.
I continue to be the clearing. It calls for continuous practice, and awarenss. Now, if the judgement comes, I free myself immediately. And I also free the other person. Clear the air before I have breathed in the mugginess I have created. Of course, practice and awareness is the key.

I intend for a life free of judgements, assumptions, complaints and blame.
Am happy to be on purpose, walking the path.

Here & Now

Am I living in the present or re-living the past? Again and again, am I recreating the stories of my life as I have 'lived' it? Have I formed beliefs about life and people based on how my life has treated me?

The answer to all of these used to be Yes. Mercifully, today, I can say that the best thing about the past is that it is over. Here are some of my reflections of the stories we carry, and the transformation that happens when we drop them.

• 
  continuing to be with my stories, is dragging my past with me
  it keeps me in comparisons, 'mine is bigger than yours'
  it keeps me from being completely with the other.. too much noise happening inside
  I connect only if I have a similar story
  I keep alive my drama
  I am not in the here and now
  so I stop flowing
  in being or recounting my story, I am becoming stagnant and stale
  when I let go my story, I let go my hiSTORY.
  I free myself to be Here and Now.
  ONLY WHEN I AM IN THE HERE AND NOW, AM IN IN LEARNING
  Only in the here and now, am I in tranformation.
  only in the here and now, am I in my full POWER, CREATIVITY, WISDOM

The Universe has no time for my stories. I am disrupting the flow, creating dissonance by pushing against the flow. It is non-cooperation.

So I choose to be in sync. Flow like the river. The river is never the same, changing moment to moment. It does not cry and yearn and hurt for what its flown through. It flows. And so am I now.

Simply flowing.

Entering the Shift Energies in emptiness

"Make a clean break with your past and you will be Enlightened, " said the Master.
"I am doing that by degrees." said the student
"Growth is achieved by degrees.
Enlightenment is instantaneous. "
Later the master said, "Take the leap!
You cannot cross a chasm in little jumps."
Anthony de Mello

2012 is almost at hand. For the last many years, I have been busy cleaning up my act. The last one year has been particularly intense. As we step into the last quarter of 2009, the task now is of building the bridge between the old familiar world and the future one we all walking towards the light are stepping into. So what is the task at hand?

The first is the understanding that some things we essentially leave behind, as we cannot enter the portal gates of 2012 with them. No baggage allowed on this trip, not even hand baggage. You may be guessing what THE first thing to drop is, and you guessed right, it is FEAR. My fear comes from my past. My memory is a product of fear. My memory got created from incompleteness with my past. Which got me further entrenched in my world of duality. The world of duality is fear based, not freedom based. I have been perennially caught in the world of right and wrong, good and bad, acceptance and rejection.

My realsation is that fear created my memory that arrested my growth while still an infant. It was my survival instinct that caused these fears to be stored in my cells to warn me of impending danger. The second girl child... rejection ... abandonment. .. etc. My earliest memory created as 'reality' of my 'drama' of rejection and unlovedness, and I called it 'TRUTH OF LIFE'. And I have been attached to this 'truth' and living from there. I believed a truth that I was small & puny.

My Body has been a bundle of memory. The intense body listening sessions released untold memories of so many lives, stored in my body cells. Wars, natural disasters, floods, fires, starvation, abandonment, rape, burning at the stake... my body was a living receptacle of endless horrific memories, even entities that controlled my thoughts.

Moments of joy do not create incompletions. We live them in the now, and they are enjoyed and released. It is only where we have felt incomplete, ( eg. rage, anger, hurt, jealousy, rejection, fear,humiliation, trauma, sadness, lonliness) that we energetically hang on to these past incidents. There are endless chords of entanglements connecting us to our past. All our past life memory still exists as unconscious memory in our cells.

I had been continually creating my future as a reproduction of my fear-based past. I was projecting my fears into the future, and then walking into them. The fears had created a dense body and aura. I drop the dense-ness. The body we take with us is a light body, free of fears.

Memory is the one thing we cannot take to the next dimension. There is a KEY to entering the higher dimensions, and the key is the frequency we vibrate in. Our introduction is no longer by our social status, education (which is nothing but memory of information), the institutions we have created, or any other earthly thing. Our introduction now is by the energy of love we vibrate in. The gates will be opened by our expanded heart chakra!

This is not the era of knowledge anymore. I can afford to forget, let go of my knowledge, cause we are entering the era of download. Whatever I require to know, I download from the great cosmic library, from my own spiritual jar, and from my DNA. The complete information to my enlightenment exists in my genetic coding. Once the memory goes, the chatter ceases, and in the quietness, I am able to percieve the new information. It is joyful! And liberating!

I certainly want to make the great transition.. . in this body. For this, I give permission to my Guides, the Masters and Elders, and my Lemurian Guides and others from the Angelic realms who are guiding us in this ascension, to cleanse and prepare me for the transition into the higher dimension. This is why I chose this human birth. To make this journey of enlightenment. Possible only on the Planet of Choice. I am ready to let go all that stands in the way.

The story of Sukhvinder as she existed is over. Am truly done with it. I see the past falling away, revealing a new glowing me, so much closer to who I am. Truly divine. Just like you.

Today, I heard the Master say, ''Any idea you have of yourself being less than god is low self-esteem. Stand up and tear it'. I obey.

To sum it up: The more I loose it, the more I get it.

you say you have loved

You say you have loved,

then has your heart ever filled with remorse,

'cause you must have walked the crooked path,

to meet your beloved?

You say you have loved,

then has your heart not quivered in fear,

when you have tip-toed in the shadows of night,

to meet your beloved?

You say you have loved,

have you spent many a cool night in fiery agony?

cause I've heard lovers speak

'tis the price to pay for the malady.

You say you have loved,

so show me,

the tell-tale scars of love you bear

that I hear lovers carry as secret talismans.

Yes, I have heard that you too,

has visited the secret rivers,

that bathe the ones who enter,

with the fires of dark magic.

Is it true that you too,

have traded your sultan's pleasures,

and spurned the anklets of Eden's houries,

for a book of verse and a cup of wine,

and solitude and wilderness.

I have heard that you too,

have sat in the bazaar of love, my friend,

and removed the cork from the bottle,to drink many a cup of wine.

Pour once again the tales you told,

to this poor addict of love.

Who Am I?

I am balance,

Yet I grow.

I am restful,

Yet I flow.

I am changeless,

Yet I transform.

I am eternal,

Yet am new born.

I am earth,

Yet I unearth.

I am whole,

Yet I birth.

I am surrender,

Yet in quest.

I am divine,

Yet am blessed.

Responsibility - at the Potter's Wheel

After 15 years of work in healing and communicating with my inner child, I come today to the core issue of responsibility. By responsibility, I do not mean the commonly understood way of taking the blame (who's fault is this). This is about moving away from the fault-lines. I am talking here of my response-ability.

Responsibility an active, life-changing stance. Responsibility is always taken, when one takes charge. Sure, I've held many roles in life. Being a daughter, wife, mother, daughter-in-law, manager, professional, team-member, voter - all of these require responsibility. Have'nt I discharged my duties to the best of my 'responsibility'?

I mean much more here. Its about being in integrity in every way. With my body, my emotions, my soul, my spirit, my relationships, my time, my life, my ecology, my dreams, my missions.

Being responbsible, for me. is beginning to mean a life free of blame and complaints. And defences. Slowly, like weeds, I am removing complaints, blaming, and explaining from my day to day existance. Like a shaggy dog shakes itself free of the water after a bath, I am constantly shaking myself free of these. And most of all, owning my projections. Very, very important. In responsibility, there is no finger-pointing. I take responsibility at all times for being in communication.

At all times, I am the Cause, the Creator. Responsiblity is a place to stand. It is space free of fear, guilt, helplessness, looking for credit or approval. Being free of guilt is still a tough one. I guess I am in guilt for a dozen things in a day. Comes from a deep-rooted internalised right and wrong paradigm and 'shoulds' that I operate from. Somewhere along the way, I internalised the oppressors as 'voices' in my head. Lots of revisiting, releasing and letting go of old patterns is happening within. And loads of loving and accepting myself.

Being responsible means I am the creator of my life. I have the power to manifest anything and everything in my life, and if I am not happy at the way my life is going, I need to look within. What am I resisting. Resistance destroys personal power. The more I resist pain and discomfort, the more it persists and the more I create it. I don't get what I want in life. I get what I create. I know now how to 'manage' disturbance in the environment by making a shift inside. At all times, who I am being is what I am manifesting. Actually, I am having quite a lot of fun doing this. It works, and how! When I heal the person, or the situation, inside of me, I bring a change in my world. Yes, responsibility is also acknowledging my power as a creator.

I understand better the cause and effect dynamics of the universe. And learn to play by the rules of the universal laws. 'What I give is what I get.' As I bring myself in balance, I bring more balance into the world.

So, here's my checklist for being responsible:

• Am I living in my world, or a world created by someone else.



• Am I the CEO of my life, or someone else is.



• Am I working on my dreams, projects, wish list with enthusiasm and gusto.



• Am I in integrity with my commitments and agreements - both to myself and others.



• Am I my authentic self at all times. ( or is fear still ruling in a threatning situation)



• Am I aware at all times that I am living my interpretation.

I am the pot, the potters wheel, the clay and the hand that moulds the clay. I am the fire, the klin, and the baking.

Completing each day in Integrity

What does it mean to complete each day? I mean, really complete? I am acutely with this realisation today. This is what opened up.

I am a procrastinator, expert in putting off to tomorrow that which I find uncomfortable. eg. I have to go to the electricity office re my bill payment, and hate the thought of it, so I look out of the window and decide 'it is too hot today, and anyway, it is not so urgent, I can also do it tomorrow'. I suddenly breathe easier, cause I have a VALID REASON now for putting it off to tomorrow. I can't do this now because..........

The pattern repeats again, cause it still is hot outside. India has long summers. And I am always being valid and with reason. I have applied loads of salve to my conscience. There has been a casualness about me. 'Its ok, I mean good', dangerous kind of self-talk. Many things that I postpone eventually get forgotton. I never meet many of my own deadlines. That's what they become: dead-end dead-lines.

The old pattern has been to have blame, complaint, defences, excuses ready to fight the guilt. I used to be ready to fight the shadow, not look at it. All this infighting created tiredness, lethargy, even powerlessness. I was trapped in my own mind games, and was filling my cells with guilt, regret, remose, and all that anxiety. All this translated into a restless mind, so if I am with my book, the mind has a niggling thought reminding me of all the unfinished tasks. When I sleep, I have these anxiety dreams of running after a train that is leaving the station..... sitting for the wrong exam......... sounds familiar?

All this because there is so much resistance to the routine and dull stuff. Give me something interesting to bite! The dusting, cleaning, filing can wait. How many times have I heard, 'what I resist, persisits'. And magnifies too!

A thought is just creeping in as I write this. Does it.... could it (gulp) mean that procrastination is my way of keeping people hooked to me? Cause they will have to keep calling me up to know if I've done the job, or waiting for me to finish, or give information, or whatever it is I am holding on to. Is procrastination my attention seeking pattern?

At the bottom of it all is my laziness. I resist work. I avoid the hard work as long as I can. I put off to tomorrow as if there is a tomorrow. Today let me enjoy. So I grab my book, and settle down on my favourite chair, with the TV remote next to me. The untidy book shelf that I had resolved to work on 'whenever I have the time', waits. And the distance between resolution and action slowly becomes unsurmountable. Now I know why. Cause, I want it done, but I dont want to do it. Sitting in my chair, I wish for a magic wand, or like Baba Yaga, a magic pair of hands, to do my bidding. Sigh! Why do fairy tales live only in books?

The part of me that wants order, neatness, completion is at war with the one that wants to just enjoy and do interesting things. The fear is, there is so much backlog that has built up, it may eat up the entire day. And the next. Now where does it leave me the time to do the fun things? So, something has to give. Either I stop bothering about the untidy book-shelf, or if that is not happening, go clean it. And then sit down with that book.

I am learning to take care of things immediately. Small steps at a time. Wash the tea cup the minute I finish my tea, make my bed the minute I get out of bed. Clip the dead leaf the minuite I notice it. And take responsibility for day I am in. Pay attention to what is calling for attention.

Can I meet all my commitments? Have I called back all the people I said I would call back, did I meet all the people I said I would meet ( at the right time), did I complete all the chores I had set out for myself, did I look at everything that called for my attention?I'm sorry to say, I've been guilty on all counts.And so, as guilt is one thing I can do without, I find the only way out is to become responsible.

In order to build integrity into my existance, this is what I am bringing into my life: Keep my agreements. If an agreement has been breached, stand up and face it. No fancy footwork. Be punctual. I know its not fashionable. Do what I have committed to. Close each day fully..... which means, complete the day before going to bed.
I'm not going to say 'I'll call you back in 5 mins.' when I know it will not happen. I am aware the minute I declare a date and time to be present somewhere, the universe starts the process to meet me there. And if I dont show up, I am out of sinc with what I have created in the universe. I am and I create dissonance. Yeah, at all times, I am required to show up where I said I would. As I write this, I am acutely aware of at least 3 things that are getting carried over to tomorrow. Sigh! I'll get there soon. Practice makes perfect.

I also have two slogans in my kitty:

Completion cures insomnia!

Beware the because!

I am reminded of having read of Tibetan monks who keep their tea bowls outside their rooms when they retire every night, so that if they die in the night, the bowls can be used by others. Now that, is completion. They practice living like there is no tomorrw.

I have a goal to manage my existance in a way that if I have to leave the planet at a moment's notice, my affairs are in complete order. Whether it is my relationships, my work, my finances or my commitments or anything else.

A neat exit.

And so is.

' There is no such thing as a minor lapse of integrity.' Tom Peters

Grounding, Growing, Encompassing

Today I am in the resolution to just be there!

Today I am in the revolution to just being there!

Today I am in the realisation of just being there!

I am inspired by the tree.

All it knows is to be there. In serenity.

In tranquility, its toes go deeper and deeper.

Soundlessly, its fingers reach closer to the sky,

Quietly, its arms encircle a wider arc,

Everchanging, it offers a daily changing view.

The vertical and the horizontal,growing at both ends.

In just being there.........it gently provides

shade,

oxygen, and,

Holds the earth from erosion,

It offers fragrance of flowers,

Fruits to eat,

Home for birds and beasts,

Swings for the children to play,

Shelter to the tired traveller.

Draws deep from the earth,

Breathes deep from the sun,

And offers in the manifest.

In just being there.........

For the buddha

It offers enlightenment,

For the christ,

The cross.

Sometimes, it becomes a landmark,

At others, a boat to travel deep waters,

a bed, a bench, a table, a home.

In all of this, it just stands.Always in the Now.

Not asking for water even if dying of thirst,

Or pleading if being cut by an ax.

The sandalwood tree,perfumes the ax that lays it low.

Can I live the wisdom of the tree I am today.